HIV+ marriage hits the block at Registrar's office

THE PAPER SCOURGE

BY PREETU NAIR
preetu_nair@gomantaktimes.com

PANJIM: Marriages are made in heaven but getting the marriage
registered on earth is an arduous task if you say, "We do" and parents
say, "You don't". The ordeal just gets harder if you are HIV positive
and the partner negative.
Ramesh and Reena realised that there are more clouds and less
rainbows in the sky of love soon after their marriage on January 26,
2006 in Vasco.
Rajeev married Reena in a temple in Goa, aware of the fact that she
was afflicted with HIV virus. However, even after ten months of
marriage they are still struggling to get their marriage registered.
The official reason given to them at the office of marriage registrar
was, "You have already married in the temple, so you can't now get
your marriage registered".
It's another matter that the Supreme Court has clearly stated that
all marriages, irrespective of their religion, should be compulsorily
registered.
The unofficial reason according to the couple: They married against
Ramesh's parent's wish. Ramesh reveals that when they were trying to
get the marriage registered, his parents with the help of a talathi
created problems for them.
"My parents are opposed to the marriage because Reena is HIV
positive, a Kannadiga and a widow. However, I love her and am happy
that I married her. Besides we have got all the necessary documents.
But that is not enough to get our marriage registered," said Ramesh, a
local lad.
Reena was tested HIV positive in 2001, when she went for a medical
check-up before going abroad for job. She contracted the virus from
her first husband, who expired in 2003.
"I was just about living when I met Ramesh, who brought a new meaning
to my life," revealed Reena.
"When I proposed to her, she refused. But when I insisted, she
revealed her HIV status and said that she didn't want to marry me
because I may also get infected. However, I was determined and we went
for counselling, wherein we were told about the precautions we need to
take. Finally she said yes," admitted Ramesh.
Interestingly, the Supreme Court in its ruling has very clearly
stated that if a person is suffering from any communicable venereal
disease then it's their moral and legal duty to inform the person with
whom the marriage is proposed that he/she was not physically healthy
and suffering from a disease which was likely to be communicated to
the partner.
"It is the duty of a person living with HIV to inform the other
partner about their status and inform and counsel them about HIV
before marriage. Even after all these, if the partner is willing to
get married and they are major, then they can't be denied a marriage
certificate. I am aware about this case and we will definitely follow
up this matter," said Jaffer Inamdar, HIV/AIDS activist.
When contacted, VG Salkar, State Registrar said, "If all documents
are okay, then the sub-registrar can immediately file for a
declaration."
Well, till that happens, Ramesh and Reena will be husband and wife in
spirit but not on paper.

(Name of the couple has been changed to maintain confidentiality)

(Gomantak Times, November 17,2006)